OK, this is actually more like the FIRST countdown, but no one has written that song that I’m aware of, and as with all things in my life, this must have a theme song.  Or twelve.  My husband keeps playing the beginning of Vanilla Ice’s “Ninja Rap,” the theme song from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II. I told him that I think it’s what caused the migraine he woke up with this morning.

So I’ve digressed… the main update is that Lefty now has an expiration date.  August 16, 2012 will be mastectomy day, aka the end of my left breast.

She’s got 13 more days… I’ve considered taking her on a farewell tour, but don’t know what it is that I think she needs to visit.  I never have done topless beaches.  And I don’t know that I’ve ever flashed anyone other than my husband… or while breast-feeding, and even then I preferred to use a blanket.  I may not shy away from TMI, but I’ve never felt the need to flash.  It wasn’t until the last few years that I started wearing things that are lower cut… and lower cut on me than they would be on those of normal sized cleavage.

The thing I’m still most neurotic about with this is that I’ll likely go at least a year with little to nothing on the left and a my cartoon boob that grew there on the right.  Unless I take my husband’s advise and fill my left bra cup with a water balloon.  Or my colleague’s and fill said water balloon with Cupcake Devil’s Food Cake Chocolate Vodka.  Depending on how all of this works on the pain scale, that just may be a plan!