I started doing a little looking to the whole wig thing, and first surprise, my insurance doesn’t have any wig allowance.  I know of places to get free ones and all, but since I have pretty good insurance, I just thought that I’d use my insurance to get a wig, and save the free stuff for people who NEED the assistance. Sigh.

The thing I originally thought that I would do is have a wig made of my own hair, so that I would just have it.  I have gotten complements on my hair kind of forever, at different times and other than the ill-fated Ogilvie home perm that was immortalized in my 6th grade school picture. I don’t know that it’s anything SPECIAL, but although my hair is fine, there’s a lot of it, kind of like tons and tons of baby hair. And it’s pretty healthy. It’s just part of who I am.

The “wig of your own hair” option?  $1600.

So, yeah, not doing that!

I actually had a really nice conversation with the guy at the wig place, and he made me feel pretty good about the process and maybe not needing his wigs. He said that the reason a lot of women do their wigs is because they have very unique hair or head shapes, or they are trying to keep their cancer status to themselves.

My hair is a long bob, not really anything UNIQUE, just mine. And I don’t think my head is oddly shaped, and in case you hadn’t noticed with this whole blog thing, I’m not exactly being shy, so I’m thinking at this time that I should learn to knit hats… since I can knit, but all I’ve ever learned to do is a scarf, and rock some sassy wigs.

Which all sounds well and good, but it feels like I’ve already given up a lot.

When you’ve had D+ boobs since 8th grade, at least for me, they become a major part of your identity.

Gone.

When I was in 7th grade, someone accidentally called me a boy, and my hair hasn’t been shorter than chin length since.

Until now.

(Am I the only one noticing a pattern here? Actually, if I could get my 1988 waistline & butt we just might be in BUSINESS Here!)

I may be physically feeling better today, but the news makes it easier to stayed holed up at home in hiding. I feel like I’m losing my physical identity piece by piece. And by January, I don’t even know who that person will be in the mirror any more.

I guess next up will be to get info on how to draw in eyebrows and use fake lashes, which I’ve never had to do before… since with the dark brown hair, I’ve had brows & lashes to match… and since those are likely to go too.

So far, I’ve been able to take most of this in stride, but if chemo takes this Brown-Eyed Girl, and makes my brown eyes blue, I’m going to be seriously, SERIOUSLY pissed!